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About Rational Discussion - AdrianG — LiveJournal [APOD]
May 21st, 2004
06:44 pm

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About Rational Discussion

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From:laracee
Date:September 2nd, 2004 07:44 pm (UTC)
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I totally agree with you!
*laugh*
You know, actually I do. I read and reread, looking for a statement I wasn't comfortable with. But I didn't find one.

Does this mean I would make a bad friend?
*laugh*
I don't agree out of loyalty, but I do agree with you on the importance of rational discussion. I have an eight year old son, and also believe that children need to have their ideas and methods challenged, when necessary. It's good for us! Truly constructive criticism is a bigger gem than praise... most of the time.
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From:adriang
Date:September 3rd, 2004 01:57 am (UTC)
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    Does this mean I would make a bad friend?

Let's hope not. 8-)
    I have an eight year old son, and also believe that children need to have their ideas and methods challenged, when necessary. It's good for us! Truly constructive criticism is a bigger gem than praise... most of the time.

I don't remember exactly when it happened, but there was a point in my childhood where my father and I started reasoning with each other and settling our differences that way. I don't have the words to describe how big a difference that early, positive experience with reasoning has made in my life. Setting out to reason and discuss more with young children is, I'm sure, demanding and difficult, but I cannot recommend it strongly enough.

Adrian
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From:laracee
Date:September 3rd, 2004 02:18 pm (UTC)
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As a child I instigated this approach with my parents... I'm not sure where it came from, but if felt much more natural to me than lying or throwing a temper tantrum. I work really hard to have open communication with my son this way.

He still needs to work on being a 'good loser' though. :D
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From:adriang
Date:September 3rd, 2004 11:05 pm (UTC)
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    He still needs to work on being a 'good loser' though. :D

That was a hard thing for me to learn, too. I had to learn that admitting uncertainty, from the start, made it much easier to give way to reason, later. I had to accept that I was responsible for setting myself up to be embarrassed when I took too strong a stance at first. It was a powerful enough lesson that, decades later, I still remember where I was when I figured it out.

Adrian
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